Families with ill-behaved, and annoying children, are rarely a pleasure to know. But families who believe you are in love with these children, are never regarded with affection. Unfortunately, not only do I know a family with such children, they do, in fact, believe me to be in love with their little hellions.

To protect the innocent (and myself, in case they should ever find my blog), I shall call them the Snibley family.

Upon returning some items to the Snibley household, I was surrounded at the door by swarming children, who were all talking at once, and demanding attention. I had no intention of staying any longer than necessary, and was thus avoiding the 'let me show you the 300 page collection of my greatest drawings', and the 'read me this book that has every fairy tale under the sun in it' demands. Due to my complete lack of feelings, I have no problem ignoring the pulling/whining/demanding of such children. This always works wonderfully until the parents come into the room.

To pretend deafness with adults who know you can hear and speak, is rather rude. And to flash "ohmygosh! I left the burner on high, and set my pot holder on top of it! I must go before my house burns down." is extreme, and slightly over-the-top.

Mr. Snibley approached, carrying the ever-snotty-nosed Oswald, and said with a knowing smile, "I bet Mrs. Joy really wants to hold the baby!"

I sweetly replied that I would love to, only, I had to be going (notice my restraint in not mentioning a burning pot holder, or sudden deafness).

"Oh, I'm sure that was very hard for you to say, since you love holding babies so much." Mr. Snibley said.

And I smiled, as I thought, 'oh yes it was hard to say, but not because I was declining to hold the child--the difficulty lied solely in trying to make sure I actually sounded sincere.'